Online Parent Support Chat

13.4.07

I'm just at a loss...

Mr. Hutten,

I am very sorry I haven’t been in touch with you sooner. Some family issues had arisen and the reason for my delay. I am still interested in your program, but I’ve been patiently awaiting the disposition of the hearing and the final results on what the court was going to decide.

As it turned out, my daughter has been found delinquent, continued to skip school while in her father’s care and was suspended, continued to have failing grades within her 3rd quarter of her sophomore year, her probation officer recommended 3 days in a detention facility for the suspension but her father said she was improving at home, I said I saw no improvement and that her part-time job at McDonald’s (she started 3 months prior) was a distraction from her schoolwork and should be stopped.

Her PO, her father, and her therapist have all recommended that she remain with her father at this time, but custody was not a factor in this case. The magistrate suspended the 3 day detention, extended her probation and decided she should write an apology letter to me for her destructive behavior when she’d been in my care.

My attorney said custody has not changed hands and that I still have legal custody, but that I have agreed to let her stay with her father for the time being. However, she is unwilling to come home to me and she gets away with everything at her father’s house. I just don’t know what to do.

She is on her way to flunking out of her sophomore year if she doesn’t pass this quarter. If you have an answer, I’m willing to listen. I want her home and to help in her direction because I felt I’ve lost any ability in bringing her to her senses.

I just had my first visitation with her on Easter Sunday and she bragged to my brother-in-law that her best friend is a 21 year old girl with a baby. This was my first visit with her in 3 months because her father wasn’t letting me visit with her and would argue with me every time I called over to speak to her. He told the probation officer that I didn’t deserve to have any visitation with my daughter. In the meantime, she is out every weekend unmonitored and involved with who knows?

She said she hates school and these older kids take up all of her time so she is uninterested in spending time studying. I put her on birth control pills before she moved over there only because I didn’t want to see her ruin her life. I’m truly scared! All of her friends are older and are tearing her down - every one of them. Her father just helped her get another cell phone. Now she has another reason not to concentrate on class work. I’m just at a loss.

GET HELP HERE

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