This all sounds wonderful & some of the problems described on your site are what I'm experiencing with my 11year old. At the moment our problems are disrespect & attitude towards being asked to do chores. Up until 3 months ago these problems were directed toward me only, but he is now talking to other adults in the same way. I need to knock this on the head before we end up with all the other problems you describe.
My son spent the last week with my parents & my mother couldn't stop telling me how wonderful he was. He washed & wiped up without having to be nagged he cleaned his room daily & was the first person ready when they went out. (All opposite to when at home).
My parents dropped him home last night & stayed for tea. After dinner mum asked him to wipe up & he reacted as if it were me asking, "Oh I have to do this". & "I cant, I need to go to my dads". My Mother did as I do & kept at him, not letting him get away with it. Her reward, She received daggers, he grunted goodbye & turned the other way when she went to hug him & did not thank her for his holiday. I have not seen my mother so hurt in a long time & I feel ashamed that my son did this to her.
He can be a loving, caring & thoughtful child & then just turn (like jekell & hyde my mother described it).
His only problems at school are finishing his work & doing his homework. His teachers say he is caring & honest he would do wonderfully if he only did the tasks assigned.
Will your program help me with this. He knows he is doing the wrong thing & when we talk about it he cries & I can tell he feels guilty but its as if he cant control it.
My Out-of-Control Child