Online Parent Support Chat

25.5.08

The only future I see is one that involves jail...

I am really not sure if my son has ODD, but we are having severe problems. He has been on ADHD medication for two years and we have seen some slight improvements in behavior. However, for the most part he is completely out of control. Every website I have gone to about ODD has a list of symptoms and every symptom given matches him.

He is destructive, argumentative, will not take responsibility for his actions and is very immature for his age. He refuses to follow directions on a daily basis, has extremely low grades in school, and no self-confidence. He used to take rocks and scratch our vehicles, but has since stopped doing that and now destroys things like my daughters' toys, his toys, his furniture, his walls, things that may take a couple of days for me to notice. He purposely annoys me, his father, and his little sisters. We can not take him out in public because he will purposely do things to embarrass us or draw attention to himself--even when he is on his medication. He seems to be very remorseful for his actions once he is yelled at or punished, but then will return to the behavior shortly after or the next day. At this point, he is literally more work than our twin girls who are two. He usually on responds to shouting--if I use a calm voice he just tries harder or does something more severe to annoy me. It really seems as though he enjoys getting in trouble. It's just tiring!

I am at my witt's end. My husband and I are seriously thinking of sending him to a camp for troubled kids because we have no where else to turn. The medication seems to do nothing if he so chooses, although it is much more manageable if he is on it (Daytrana patches). He is much more compliant on the medication and will do chores more easily, but there are times when he is on the patches that I can see no improvement in behavioral problems. He has NEVER had a year in school where he hasn't been put on some kind of behavior chart. Time and time again he is put in ALC and sent to the principal's office because he can not keep his hands to himself or keep from aggravating other students or because he is being utterly terrible to the teachers. He is overly aggressive and many times his "friends" or their parents will tell the teacher that he has been pushing and shoving and hurting them. He can be the sweetest child, but then there are days when I can't stand to be around him. His behavior has become a cancer in my home and it is affecting everyone negatively. We are desparately trying to raise our daughters in a chaos-free environment, but my son seems to only want to function in chaos. Behavior charts don't work, he has no understanding of other's feelings, or the value of things. We have tried rewards and punishments and nothing works. We are just looking for some help.

My son is a good kid and has lots of potential and I want him to have a good future. At this point the only future I see is one that involves jail.

My Out-of-Control Child

No comments: