Online Parent Support Chat

17.9.08

I am trying to set more limits and be firm but feel I'm not doing it effectively...

We have an 8 yr old son who has always been very sweet and well behaved but he does have alot of energy and can be anxious. He has had night terrors since he was 2 yrs old, he was a colicky baby and he now is wetting his bed and ends up coming into our bed every nite by 2am. In the last year and most noticeably in the last 3 months he has been increasingly rude and annoyed with me. He will say "MOM..just leave me alone..can you just stop bugging me and give me some peace.. quit bugging me" or he will talk in a way that is disrespectful. My husband and I have gone thru some bad times and I thought he was mirroring how he will see my husband speak to me but now that my husband and I have noticed it and are in couple's therapy we are trying to be more aware and respectful to each other. How can we blame him if this is what he sees? we must change first.

But despite saying things like B you may not speak to Mom that way. Or ...I know I may be annoying you and Im sorry but you cant' speak that way or there will be consequences.. We have taken away his precious Pokemon cards but only for a day and says if he has good behavior he may earn them back..etc. He also can be loving and sweet and at nite he will hug me and tell me he loves me. It's like he is already a teenager..he feels embarrassed in front of his friends with me. "why do you have to say hi to everyone..MOMMMM can you just please stop talking..you're driving me crazy..you're sooo annoying...jeesh..just leave me alone:.

He has been a top student and received the highest marks in all his classes last year for 2nd grade..but I'm already seeing the beginning of his being defiant..also trying to do everything quickly..etc.. He can be great and he is a great kid..it's just this behavior is something I feel has already gone on too long and I'd like to nip it in the bud..is your class/book appropriate for him..He has gotten physical in a negative way with his sister and a younger kid at Aftercare one day. His Aftercare teachers were shocked that he displayed this kind of behavior..Help..what is happening to our son? I am trying to set more limits and be firm but feel I'm not doing it effectively.

My Out-of-Control Child

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