She is destroying the fiber of our home and tearing at an already frayed marriage...

When our daughter does something awful, like a temper tantrum, throwing things, cursing her parents, vile language (yes, all at the same time) besides our trying to remain calm, I instructed her to go to her room. Her mom, Lea, and I agreed this would be a good short term consequence for her flare-ups and there should be no goodies like her electronic devices--just reading material.

Problem is, she refuses to go to her room and defiantly says, "You can't make me go to my room or do anything. What are you going to do, hit me?" She then stormed out of the house at night and we went to look for her. Fortunately she was found not too far away tearing at her skin and sobbing that we would not let her use her cell phone to contact a 16-yr old boy in Miami who she has had multiple instances of phone sex with.

You hit the nail on the head when you said maybe you just want your child out of the house. WE DO! She is destroying the fiber of our home and tearing at an already frayed marriage. But we can't afford Group Homes or any of the alternatives I have researched. At some point do we just hand her over to authorities as a dangerous, suicidal, destructive youth and let the state do whatever they do? Honestly, we feel if she continues on her path some very bad things are going to happen like drugs, suicide, attacking her family at night, who knows? Lea and I and are son AJ are all pretty normal, peace-loving people and don't understand her behavior and choices and are tired of being victimized.

Lea and I also feel like we are in this alone as we don't want our friends or parents to know the evil Veronica is in to. We have gone to individual therapy, family therapy, marriage counseling, psychiatrist meetings (have another one of those tomorrow). I don't see the therapy as being effective at all.

My Out-of-Control Teen

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