Online Parent Support Chat

23.4.09

She is very defiant...

I have a 13 year old daughter. Before Christmas she was not doing her homework, not interested. She was sick for 2 weeks with strep throat and from then on she did not want to go back to school. She would go sometimes to the resource room and do homework, would not last for long. She will go out with friends, things she wants to do, but will not go to school. She is very defiant in everything we ask her to do.

She just watches TV and eats, she has put on weight. She does keep her self pretty clean and still will go out with friends. I believe she just does not want to go to school, I don’t believe she is depressed because she goes out with her friends when we let her. Anytime I try and talk to her she won’t listen, leave the room. The only time she is nice and will talk is when she is getting something back like a friend over, going to youth group, something she wants. I know what she is doing, but I don’t want her not to have contact with her friends. She wants to be left alone, not to talk to her. It’s as if she is a stranger or someone just staying there like a boarding house. What can I do.

She has already missed 3 months of school. I have called the Crisis Stabilization Unit, this is after you have tried everything. They will come out to the home and talk to the child and make them go to school, they will also take that child away for a few days to a group home to show them what it’s like in a group home. We may go this way, seems nothing is working. I have tried to get her to see a child youth counselor, and also a child psychiatrist, she will not see anyone. I am at my wits end. What can my husband and I do. We also have a 18 year old son, who does well for himself. Totally different person. He is in his first year of Engineering at University. He has tried to ask her why she won’t go to school but she won’t tell him. She does keep promising she will go back to school next week. Nothing happens, and she still expects to get all the benefits which I don’t give her.

My Out-of-Control Daughter

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