Online Parent Support Chat

18.6.09

Out Of Control Daughter

I have a just-turned-17 year old daughter who has always been a difficult, but good, kid. She will be a Senior in high school in the fall and seems to be feeling very stressed about the whole idea of growing up. She is hard-of-hearing, uses sign language as her first language but hangs out mostly with hearing kids (she is in public school with sign language interpreter support in the classroom and also speaks and lipreads very well).

She lives with me (mom and step-dad) and with her dad and step-mom. Dad and step-mom are deaf; step-dad and I are hearing. I am a fluent signer, interpreter, and teacher at the state school for the deaf so communication has not been an issue. All of the parenting team get along well. She also has a step-sister, 10 months younger, who signs fluently, too, and is, if anything, a "golden" child.

This past year her grades have started to falter--went from a 3.76 gpa to a 3.16, she has complained of fatigue, and she has become more beligerent than usual. When I try to plant the seed that it is time to thing about what is important to her and what she wants for herself, she shuts down and gets downright nasty. She has an inflated sense of her skill as an athlete, although she is a very good pitcher/1st base softball player, and is blaming her time on the bench on the coaches (partly true as the other pitcher/1st base is the coaches daughter) instead of looking at what she can do to earn more time.

My Out-of-Control Daughter

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