Online Parent Support Chat

6.9.09

Kortney has a very short fuse...

I have three children and two of them are great and I am at my wits end with my other child. She turns 14 today. I have punished her, taken away all of her priveledges and her favorite things that she enjoys and none of it gets to her. When I punish her, the other two have to suffer a little with her and they are great straight "A" students and its not fair to them. Just, please send me the out of control teen ebook and programs so I can download it and start it as soon as possible. I need to see some positive changes in her badly. I want to know that there is still hope for me to turn her into the person I know she has thepotential to be and please make sure that I don't get charged twice. Because like I said a charge has already gone through on the 4th and then one is tring to go through for the 8th. The one for the fourth has an order number one it next to my bank statement online, but the other one does not. Thanks and sorry for being such a pain. ijust lead a very stress filled life. My husband works out of state 16 to 20 days a month and leaves me at home doing everything and rearing the kids alone most of the time. I know I aqm not perfect, but as housewife it is my job and I feel like I am failing miserably. Kortney is from another marriage and she goes back and forth, both of our parenting skills are pretty strict. She takes things from us and others and doesn't think it stealing, she tells us that she was just using it and that's not stealing. I try to explain to her that if she doesn't ask for it or if we tell her she can't have it or use it that it is stealing, but she constantly does it.

I found a note from her to a friend on how to get back at your parents when they make you mad, explaining everything that she does to us. Which really burned my ass, because she always just shrugs her shoulders when I ask her why she done it and she says I don't know or I was just using it. Yet, I find a letter explaining all her devious actions in it to a friend. I feel lke when I take her places that I need to weigh her when we get there and weigh her when we leave, to make sure she hasn't taken anything. That is just a ridiculous feeling to have to have when you go places with her.

I admit that she has been a little spoiled. I just to give her alot, but it was generally rewards for good things, but on theother hand, my mother has given her everything she has ever wanted, up until a few months ago when she started disrespecting her and hitting my other two kids.

Kortney is extremely strong, she has been in gymnastics and works out alot. She is built like a bulldozer. She is getting increasingly stranger by the day. When her friends or people come over to stay or visit, she will go inside the house or to another room and sit in the dark listening to the radio. She wants her way and wants to be in control of everyone. I am sure that she gets these traits from me, because I am a dominator, a very strong woman. Had to toughen up when I was married to her dad. He was brutal. I took self-defense classes and crazily taught my children everything I learned, so they would be able to defend themselves, which isn't a bad idea, I don't think, but Kortney just takes things to extreme. She never picks or plays with her friends, she wants to be in control of them or the get their butts whipped. At this point, I am feeling like she needs to be stripped of all her bad ways and reprogrammed.

Her real dads marriage is on the rocks and when she goes over there, she intentionally makes them fight. Her step-mother is not a bad lady, but being married to him, I can understand her stresses. Kortney feeds on that. She has never tried to Stand up to Brandy, her step-mom, until labout a month ago. Brandy was mad at her about something and was yelling at her and Kortney turned to walk away to avoid the argument, then Brandy grabbed her by the arm and swung her around and ticked Kortney off and Kort jumped up in her face and started hollering at her ad her dad came in just in time to grab her fist right before it made contact with Brandys face.

Kortney has a very short fuse and I am hoping to lengthen it some and learn how to deal with her in other ways, using your program, instead of taking everything from her and grounding her. I just frankly need help... If I seem to loose my patients easily, it's because I do alot, but I am trying to destress my life. I have stopped hanging out with people who create chaos and live for the drama in their lives. I just can't take it all anymore. I am getting told for this crap.

My Out-of-Control Daughter

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