Online Parent Support Chat

30.10.09

We told her she basically has NO privileges until she breaks it off with BOY...

We have been having trust issues with our daughter. I am in serious need of finding a starting point with her right now and was hoping you could help. I will make it as brief as possible.

She just turned 16 in July has been at least 3.0 student and been in her sport for 6 years. In comes "BOY" "15 with minimal parenting". Since he has entered her life she has lost most of her privileges, i.e. texting: because she was texting him in school and grades were falling. She keeps getting grounded because she says she is going to a friends and I find out she is meeting up with him.

Here's the clincher: Last weekend she says she is going to a friends for the night. The two girls invite the two boys to "sneak" into the house while parents are asleep. Boys bring alcohol and my daughter ends up having sex (for the first time - which I know to be true), My husband and I find out through the grapevine what has happened. We call all parents involved, all kids are in trouble, except of course "BOY". Who, by the way is constantly trying to get her to sneak out to meet him.

So, we have made a big fuss with all parents, my daughter looks like a big slut, her dad wants to dis-own her and all I can do is cry. We told her she basically has NO privileges until she breaks it off with BOY. Which is obviously a mistake because we most likely wont be able to stand by this and she just runs to BOY at school each day. There is no good communication in our house right now. I have told her if she wants things to be different then she should approach me with an alternative, but she has not.

I have heard from a friend that she is thinking about taking legal action to be removed from our house. PLEASE HELP me with a place to begin healing.

My Out-of-Control Daughter

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