We have an out of control teen (drinking and he recently got caught drinking at baseball practice) and not coming home on time, totally disrespectful to the parents. I'm his stepmother and he's 16. I've been in his life for 7 years now, married for 5. He's lived with us for 2 because his mom couldn't handle him. He is basically a good kid but not to his parents. I don't really know what to do. I'm angry and I've lost a lot of respect for my husband as he sets rules and he constantly breaks them – not only with this child but with his 2 others as well. I mean, he can't even follow a rule (my husband) for a day with these kids for the most part. We are not on the same page and now they have finally sought help because I insisted as he stated to my husband that he was going to punch me in my face (I heard him as he called DH on cell phone in the next room and DH put him on speaker). He had been drinking when he said it. I told him if I found out he was in the car with his friend and they were drinking that I would call the police. I would do so to protect him. I also told him, after his threat, that if he threatened me again or touched me I would also call the police. Threats are not acceptable to me. He has pretty much been respectful towards me until this time. There is a lot of tension in my home. My husband is getting help and needs to set up rules and follow them but I have no faith that he will follow anything, and nothing will change. He thinks all therapists are quacks. We are all (including his mother) going to meet with a therapist in a few days to go over rules that are to be set up (a contract that I tried to set up with Rules/Privileges/Consequences over a year ago that my husband agreed to follow and never did). I don't want to go because I know that DH will not follow them...and nothing will change. The parents are the problem. The mom has no control in her house at all. I don't know if your program will help me. I'm kinda fed up at this point and am very unhappy.
My Out-of-Control Teen