My 16 yr old daughter just got arrested today for shoplifting in Walmart. She took a bunch of makeup, nail polish...small things that added up to about $75 so she was arrested and taken to the police station-even handcuffed. This was all VERY upsetting for her, and Walmart is pressing charges. Her 14yr sister was with her and although didn't take anything herself she knew what was going on. I am holding her responsible as well. I need advice as to how to punish the girls.
They don't really fit in to the category of out of control teens. They both get good grades and are active in sports and other activities and are basically good, successful kids and typical teens with nice friends ect. I realized from listening to the CD's my own reaction to their misbehavior was usually making things worse and my punishments were too long. Simple changes I immediately made in myself made things better quickly but this....WE really don't know how to handle and don't want to go overboard. This was a stupid mistake that I myself made when I was her age and definitely learned from it. Some of our thoughts and concerns on how to handle this....
The 16yr old just got a car from us a few months ago. We initially told her she would have to get a job this summer to pay for gas etc. In lieu of what happened, we are now considering getting rid of the car altogether OR just taking it away for the summer OR until she gets a job OR for a week or two. At this point we have decided that she is grounded (not sure how long) with no phone or car. She will be missing several graduation parties this week as school just ended. Volleyball conditioning starts Monday and this is new for her. I don't want to take that away as that is productive and will allow her the opportunity to try out in the fall. Much better than sitting around in her room or watching TV. She loves to read so even if TV is taken that won't be much of a punishment.
The 14yr old is supposed to go to Washing DC tomorrow on a school trip. We paid several hundred dollars for this trip and her friend/roommate will also suffer if she doesn't go. We could just ground her when she returns. No phone TV or friends.
My daughter is VERY remorseful and already being pretty hard on herself about this but this is a FELONY! and we don't want to take it lightly. We were told she will have to go to court before a judge and get some sort of punishment also.
My Out-of-Control Teen