Online Parent Support Chat

15.6.10

I'm hoping to get some answers to what is going on with my adopted son...

There is a lot of background here so bear with me. I am emailing every link that I could find to your website to my son's remedial worker that we were working with prior to his lockup. I'm hoping to get some answers to what is going on with my adopted son through one of you. As expected, we're not getting much from the state. His biological sister disappeared from our rural home when she was 15 and he was 12. She made allegations about marajuana and we went through hell with the system from April until Oct-Nov of last year. (We tested negetive thoughout). My son saw how easy it was to "get mom and dad in trouble" and has since launched his own nasty war against us. In Sept of last year, he decided to wreck havoc in the small town we live in to the tune of $2000, got busted for marijuana that he claims that he was growing on our property (which we have never found), broke in our room because we felt that we needed to deadbolt it even when we were sleeping to steal cigarettes (a ladder to our 2nd story window in the middle of a snowstorm in Iowa) and various other infractions. I am so tired. I lost my job in Feb '09 due to these kids and have fought for them tooth and nail to get them right. I was called to my 15 year old's daughter's school to strip search her for cigarettes. That was not the first time and my boss had enough. She left shortly after and has been on the run until they caught her prostituting last Feb. We are very family oriented and are really trying to looking out for these kids but, what can we do? We're involved with the courts because of what my daughter said but in a general way. Help me to understand what to do with my son. He has Attachment/Reactive disorder and was diagnosed with ODD in his younger years and conduct disorder since he was physically removed from our home and put in a psychiatric ward before being court ordered for the charges that (finally) came about to a juvenile home. He's been there for 2 and 1/2 months and isn't progressing at all. We go and see him by-weekly (due to gas prices) and he's great with us but a little a**hole with who he's working with there. Since we don't have the back up of therapy and how to deal with these (sorry to say) meth babies, we don't know what to do. We have never had any support trying to raise them. The "system" told us when we adopted them that they were meth babies and we would see problems with their educational or behavoiral systems. And that was it. No intervention what so ever. We adopted these guys when they were young - 5 and 2. My daughter has already asked if she can go into foster care (so she can stay close to her homies and her adult website) but my son acts like he wants to come back home. I'm sorry for the rant but I am so tired. I found your youtube submissions very informative and, if you don't mind, I'd like to use them in my thesis paper for College Comp II!!

Thanks for listening to me rave. This isn't even the half of it.

Online Parent Support

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